Getting Hairy

It might be curls
      it might be denying your manhood
      like you had none.
      I don't know.
      It might be the troll I've become.
      There are three
      a triad
      something I forgot
      living to replay the same scene
      ad nauseum
      till remembered.
      Looking at the purple mountainside
      with the running paint snow
      and the horses below.
      We gathered up the sticks
      burlap dresses
      deer skin boots
      love beneath a tree in the dewy grass

      as the sun began to rise.

      Warm satisfaction slid down my thigh
      as I couldn't look away from your eyes
      like I'd gathered myself in a ball
      transported straight into your body.
      no longer one but two
      energy particles; my place in the air,
      mixed with the energy particles
      of your soft black hair
      unable to pierce the inside
      but mingling with the surface
      your hands
      your nails
      the soft downy hair on your belly.
      Was now an extension of me.

      There was a storm
      the rain fell hard
      I gathered my things
      and looked for you everywhere
      a tree had fell
      i went to look but could not
      my feet were planted on the ground
      and a ball of flame hit my chest
      i couldn't swallow
      in a heap
      rain felt so good on my face
      I was so hot.
      like a chain link being broken
      I began to regress
      cells began to die
      no more.

      There is rain in the ceiling
      where the spots bring water down
      there's earth in the souls of my feet
      daily reminded I'll never be there again.
      But I don't even care
      The end of euphoria
      is either death or down
      I am down
      my tears flow too much
      too far
      my heart breaks
      my soul.
       (aside...should that be the energy in my cells?
                 something started me )
      now
      returns to the sun.
      loop de looooooop.
      Helium and Hydrogen magic H.
      Come all of you heavy laden
      into the arms of the sun.
      and I will ease your burden
      and send you out again as a ray of light.