Monday, August 1, 2011

Not about beer

I love you. 
You make me happy two at a time
I would move heaven and earth
just to have you near me tonight.
but you're here and I have 12 of you. 
12.I feel like a mega god

just all to myself. 
Shit now my mind wanders to mega nerd
his lips curl up in a triangle 
where no triangle should ever be
he carries his lowdown opinion 
with his head down and the back of his neck showing
surrendering to decapitation.
sorry dude but that is so 17 century.

As above so below
so inside so without.
No he said I'm a litany of innovation
with a brain to build a monument to my misgivings
in here 
all energy
you don't know me.
take away my body
and I am Einstien world government
and god watchmakers and imagining the real.

Sorrry I stepped into your universe
but at first I didn't care to care
because it was an ugly universe
and all I felt was pain
and hours minutes days a waiting game
to step into the new.
No they smile with their keep warm carry ins
and it's okay you know god takes care of everyting girl
you just put your life in gods hands and ask the forgiveness of the lord
accept jesus christ as your personal savior
and you can fuck up as much as you want
and get away with it
he is building his mansion and in it there are many rooms.
the universe shatters into so many compartments
Would you provide the carry in if I told you
it's all a lie we are and will always be pure energy?
I always liked green bean casserole. many universes so many stacked top to bottom in quadrants
paper thin 
I see them in my mind all it's all connected yet separate
geometric lines in the form of an incomplete prism.
Big debates with my uncle Charlie
he was a staunch fundamentalist christian.
I told him after he dies to contact me so I can say 
I told you so.
I see him every so often with wisened eyes and a bit of a smile
no one likes to be duped
but hey i told him so.
Oh btw he's dead, sort of.
There is no cease to be there is only change
from one form to another
even a nuke
would just change one thing to something else
nothing ever really disappears
its just not there 
ha ha which is actually a place.
Think about not there
the opposite of there which is a place
therefore not there is actually a place to be too.

I can see not there 
look you can see it too
it's empty and not there.
SO universe expands out to no where or not there
if there is a center of all the universes 
it would just be pulled back to the beginning which is
a single dot of massive energy.
but where is the center?
and what force could cause a reflux or bringing back?
It would have to be something unheard of.
Not centrifugal then just pulled back through
hmm maybe through every worm whole the universe would 
continually be pulled and pushed
to where it did not contract
but just folded into itself like a cardboard box.

hmm i think more like a clay ball
where the worm holes sucking and pulling
each universe into a massive block
they don't quit causing connections
till the push and pull continues in a loop
making a large blob which disappears into itself.
what if?
what if?
what if?

Why can't I wear an apron and smile?
make delicious dinners
open my door
love and respect
with something to believe.
Do the dishes and relax in front of the tv
everything in its place a place for everything.

I guess it's cause I'm insane I guess. fuck.

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